Yesterday was one of my worst days in recent times.
I had an appointment with the Doctor, then an hour later I had an appointment with the Nutritionist. Then in 2 hours, I had time with the trainer.
I had a complete meltdown in the Doctors office. I sort of opened up a can of worms, then tried to shut it, which of course was not going to happen. So I got to be really upset about that can of worms. Boy when you open something up, it's just open until its resolved, so it's remaining as a yukky thing to deal with.
Then I went on to the Nutritionist, and found my intake was still low. Seems a snack is not just a snack, its a carb (fruit/veggie/grain) and a protien (Peanut butter/egg/meat) So that made things low. I know I was in her office, but I was so exhausted from the Doctor I have no idea what we talked about.
Then I went to the trainer. I ran one mile on the treadmill, and was tired. training session was difficult. She knew I was upset, and she had this intern with her. I was very very annoyed at having a stranger observe my session, so i just essentially ignored her and just talked to the trainer about the session and didn't worry about the intern who I think heard more than she expected. I was exhausted. Trainer was good. She is a funny person. She doesn't seem to be too "deep" of a person, but then she has this quiet way of letting me know she gets the full picture of the situation.
my friend that I can talk to about this still doesn't get it. But she is learning to avoid discussion of eating or training, and just to be friendly.
So, I did tell Dr G. that I wanted to run the New Mexico Half and the Full in November. He said I might have to do less swimming, but left it open as long as the Nutritionist was aware of it. So once I got my head on straight I emailed her and got this response:
thanks for the update. Nutritionally you are ok to run as long as you feel consistent in the food plans we have set up..
And yes you are right, the plan is carb/pro before run, 3 meals, 1 carb/pro as a snack, and honoring any hunger in between…
Keep me posted and feel free to contact me with any more questions..
Sooo, the good news is that I CAN train.
Of course, I feel so lousy I am not training that well, but possibly If I can figure out how to conquer the can of worms I have opened, I might be training better. I am having some left shin pain, point tenderness, which is reminiscent of a stress fracture. Due to the disordered eating, my bones aren't extremely strong, so We'll see how this all pans out.
I'm extremely tempted to simply quit. I keep telling myself that it's early in this game, so I'll give it another week or two and see how things go…..