Lifes Little Updates…

Well,  WORK, has been a real adventure.  Like I noted in my last post…some things have been very difficult.  Last week was one of those weeks.  I had made several “errors” in handling things.  So, I was feeling incredibly down and mopey on the last 2 days of work that I had to work.  I am learning that it is really difficult to work on anything long term when one feels like they are in trouble.  It is paralyzing.   So I was not enjoying my week.  I did finally managed to get some things done, and kind of just deal with things.

On Friday, I came back from lunch to a big green folder on my desk.  Immediately I looked in it.  It was 2 purchase requests that had been signed by our CFO.  I was to sign my approval on the purchases.  One of the purchases was a project I had been working on since I got this job.  I had thrown up my hands, trying to push it through.  I had given my written proposal to a Manager and found out how it was supposed to be submitted.  He did it.  Apparently the CFO decided to approve it, despite the very big expense involved.  I saw the CFO, and I asked him, “Does your signature mean you approved this and we will get these?”  and he said , “well, yes, thats what my signature means.”

So I then asked him if I could tell anyone else, and he said yes, SOOO, I took that juicy piece of news over to the Intensivist who dislikes me.  He could have been blown over by the lightest wind when I shared that.  High fives all over.  The nicest part was that the CFO happened to be walking by and the Intensivist pulled him over and said,  “You know this woman she just saved you a pile of money”  (The proposal was for about 30K of equipment, meant to save us about 80K in treatment of hospital illness.).

So the week ended on a high note.  Only thing…the Intensivist is not in charge of me, so his opinion really does not matter.  I do hope though if I remain in this job that I will be able to work better with him now.  I was pleased to be praised (this kind of ties into later in this post), and I also like how I was able to work with a variety of people and now we can all share in our success.  I admit I was concerned, egotistically, that everyone else would be recognised except me.  While I don’t really crave celebration of myself, I do want people to know that I am working hard and that I am worth the paycheck!   It’s a hard balance, I want to be humble, but at the same time, I want people to see that I do the job I was hired for…. Hopefully the product will really work.

I do miss my old job.  The schedule was more conducive to running and training, but what can one do?  God really does have a plan or each and every one of us.   I think though- whenever we say “God has a plan”  We expect some sort of grandiose thing…you know- God wants you to “Save all starving Children” or “Minister to the sick in Tanania” or “Adopt all unwanted children!”

In our lives, I really think that God’s plans are not always grandiose, and one can serve in any capacity.  As Martin Luther King Jr said.

You don’t have to watch the Oprah stuff….  and if you dislike Oprah, or you like this  MLK statement very much you may listen to his entire sermon…

I also really recommend you listen, its worth 19 minutes of your life.  It may change your life, if you really listen and think.

As far as running.  I’m finally recovered from whatever I did to my left leg recently.  But I am way behind on training for my Half in July, so I decided just to bag it and run the 4 miler instead.  No point in being miserable.

I pushed back all of my Marathon plans to February, and oddly when doing that, I have been able to run a lot of races I have wanted to do for some time now!   And a few I actually already know I dont like much.. but when your plan says, run 15K…and you have an actual local 15K race, you kind of have to do it, its kismet…. I want to raise some money with my Marathon.  I’m in debate, I want to either raise for Multiple Sclerosis Research, or possibly the Food Bank.  My cousin has MS, and it has really stolen much of her life…I so admire her for her positive attitude.

I’m very interested to see how training goes. I picked a fairly aggressive schedule.  My only question right now is that the training involves a key workout of hills every 3 weeks.  I’m not really sold on running hill repeats just yet.  Will have to consult my old Physical Therapist.   My Hip is fairly healed, but I tend to get little strains in the area, due to continued weakness.  I have learned not to freak out when things feel tender, mostly because I now have enough experience with the whole hip labrum repair to understand that this is not permanent, it is just a tiny strain.  I am going to start training using a Half Mary training schedule in later July, and then switch a week to the end into a fairly aggressive Marathon training schedule.  It’s not totally aggressive, but there are midweek runs up to 10 miles, which to me is pretty long for a midweek.  I’ll see how things go… I still have the services of the best Massage Therapist in the country for the moment, though she is currently being courted by of course, Olympians, and also some Major League Baseball teams.  She really helps me stay in perspective as well.  Nothing like being nude, and strapped to a table screaming in pain to put things into perspective.

This week is also the first time I want to start Talking about Operation Christmas Child.  Back to school stuff is now for sale (already!)  and it is a great time to pick up crayons, colored pencils, erasers, small notebooks and paper for your holiday boxes.  I do want to say I know that some of the politics of Operation Christmas Child’s parent organization are actually not very Christian.  However…I remember being a kid also.  I was never all that aware of the politics behind all that.  I think this is reprehensible.  I also think that for a child in an impoverished situation, getting a box full of toys at Christmas…thats all that they will be focused on…not any sort of message. I do not ever donate any extra cash to the organiation, for fear that it would be used to spread that rather hateful and stupid message.   If you would choose not to support that, there are always of course toy drives in your local community.  Since the boxes of crayons were on sale for 0.25 cents a box, I bought quite a few boxes.  Most kids get new crayons in September, so by December, a new box would probably be welcome! I avoided the markers, just because I feared they would dry up by the Holiday.  If you are interested in making a box for Operation Christmas Child…click the link, it will explain everything.

This is really why I do this.  Samaritans Purse has the infrastructure to reach into so many places that no one else can…so yes, its worth it..

Soooo, I am going to listen to MLK, and try to see my way.  I’m not here to do anything but serve, Just listening to the speech while I was typing this, I find myself in a much more settled state mind.  Indeed, I want to be successful, but I wonder exactly what does success look like?


5 thoughts on “Lifes Little Updates…

  1. I read a book called Grace Killers which had a piece of advice that has helped me a great deal. It said that when you are making decisions or feeling stressed about what is going on, ask yourself if you are worried about what man thinks or what God thinks. If you are worried about what man thinks, then change your perspective. If you are worried about what God thinks, then start praying about it.

    There are many times I’ve found myself confused about what to do, and I ask myself that question. More times than not, I am worried about what man thinks. When I change my perspective to think about instead what God thinks, it usually makes the answer very clear. God always knows what it is in your heart.

    Keep fightin’ the good fight, lady. Let go and let God 😉

  2. It’s so hard to keep focused on something like training for a race when you’re still adjusting to the hours, the duties, and people’s expectations in a new job. Hang in there: it sounds like people at work are impressed by your abilities. Do listen to that little voice inside that says it’s unhappy with certain things, however. That’s also part of how you shape your path to success.

    It’s a little early for me to be thinking of Christmas, but locally they’re asking people to donate school supplies for children whose families have been hit hard by the recession. They’ve closed two elementary schools in our area due to declining enrollment and poor performance on tests, however. It makes me wonder if my donations will even go to a child in our neighborhood. 😦

    • HG- I think you could easily drop off the supplies at the school in your neighborhood…and then you would be sure of where the things went. I try to do it early, because Nothing irritates me more than knowing that the cost was so low in July, and in December its up to 1.25….I’m just cheap!

  3. Congratulations. Our worst enemy is self doubt. I wrestle with it all the time, it is always sitting on my shoulder and whispering in my head, but the upside is that it makes me strive harder for that goal. Everyone takes time to settle in and adjust to a new role. Be kind to yourself and remember to laugh. All will be well.

    If not I shall hit them with my stick. Done deal.

  4. Way to go on getting the CFO’s approval!

    It is very difficult when there is a lot of politics involved in a well meaning organization but like you said, the children won’t know about that. They will just see the new crayons or toys.

    🙂 I hope you are doing well.

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