Funk

I feel like I’m in a Funk.

Nope Not Funking out….

Just Funky.

 

Funny thing is that pretty much everything is going “OK”.

I had my “annual evaluation”  at work last friday.  It was very good.  I should get a raise when they dole them out.  I was not given any of that “constructive criticism”.  My Manager seems to really feel I am “doing a tremendous job”.   So check, I am “ok” in the job.  I worry a lot about the job. It had a ton of responsibilities that are so totally different than my previous ones.  I’m not 100% satisfied with it, but I am also not 100% miserable.  So I guess it’s like many jobs.  I do get the benefit of making a difference.  I just find sometimes the pressures of the job to be a bit more than I care for.  Certainly, I miss working 3 days a week.  Gee, sounds like everyone’s job!

Training is going Well!  I really enjoy my new coaching situation. It is affordable.  I kind of balked at the initial price. Now, I see that I get more than my money’s worth.  The plan he has put together has given me 2 PR’s.  One when I wasn’t even trying  and the other, I faced many interesting challenges and probably shouldn’t have had a PR.  On top of that, he somehow easily puts up with my neurotic personality.  In fact, I think he finds it mildly entertaining. We don’t do a lot of workouts together, but when we do they are usually fun.   The best thing about the new training is that in the last 1-2 weeks I have stopped, FINALLY, having the aggravating pulling/pinch sensation in my repaired hip.  He knows what he is doing.  My Hip feels super super good.  I love running without that constant irritation and pain, and the fear in the back of my head that if I speed up or take a sharp turn something is going to go POP.  Now… that sure doesn’t mean I’m not careful.  So no complaints there.  I’m currently 3 weeks away from a Half Marathon attempt.  I don’t feel prepared, and I have a goal time in mind, and I see from my training that I am not quite at the goal time yet.  In other words, if I have the Race of My Life, I might get it.  most likely I will be 5-10 slower, but…who knows.  and really who cares. I’m SO grateful for this coach.  I can not even begin to explain how I feel when I think about the progress I’ve made both in speed and in decreasing pain.  He knows how to work with me, when we do a work out, I always feel totally wiped out by the end…and all with out the usual “personal trainer fluff”  I mean, he never claps, cheers, yells or otherwise “motivates”.  He has never said, “Come on, toughen up”.  If I quit something midway, he lets me. It’s my training after all.  I had a rough week this week and kind of showed my totally bad side.  He seemed to take it in stride, kind of shut down my “noise”  and got me refocused to where I should be.  SO training, going well. CHECK.

Through running this year, unlike any other year, I’ve made some really good friends.

 

I’ve also lost one.  I started to get faster and faster, and while I’m still age graded as pretty slow, I’m suddenly a wee bit faster than her possibly.  I remember several years ago her surprised statement, “Your half time is better than mine!”.  She has repeatedly refused to run with us as a group stating various reasons, but from chatting with her in the past, I knew it was because she thought she couldn’t train well running slow with me.  The last few long runs I’ve done have been much much faster than her.  To me it is the reward of hard work.  Sadly, she pretty much has stopped talking with me.  Guess I was only her friend when I was slower.  Hmmm.  I fight a bit with the sin of pride. it’s ok to be proud, but to get all competitive, over something like a “fun run” is pretty stupid.

So training. Check going well.

Social life check.  Going pretty well.  I admit that I’d really like to start doing some dating again.  I’ve “met” some people via the internet through Daily Mile or blogs, but no one close by seems to be either single, or my age, or not Gay.  I have no issue with Gay people, but it’s really hard for me to be sexy for a gay man you know.

Hmmm,

You know I think my Funk just may well clear up as soon as this rest day is Over!

 

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2 thoughts on “Funk

  1. Hmm. It sounds like the running buddy has an ego problem and hates being outdone, even when it’s not really a race.

    I’ve had ‘friends’ who were happy to hang out with me when I was down on my luck. As soon as things got better for me and I was doing well, they couldn’t be bothered to even meet for coffee. I wasn’t sure if my misery made them feel better about themselves, or they enjoyed my being a “charity case.” Oh well. Do you think you could combine a date with a run, so you get a running buddy and a boyfriend in the same package? 🙂

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